November 24, 2008

Family!

Here I am, working hard and sweating harder! Thanksgiving is coming and passing, wee!!!! And I am already thinking of Christmas. We have set up our christmas light in our little room. They have been sitting there for a few years and every companionship around december sets them up.
I
m trying to write this but theres an annoying greengo missionary that keeps asking me stupid questions and he WONT SHOVE IT! Tee hee! Im sorry. I cant think!!!
Nick is 19.... Im old.
Nolan sent in his what!?!?!?!? MISSION PAPERS!!!! What!?!?! When is he leaving!? What the crap!? Im really really old....
I miss golf...
Tyson is going to Canada!? Speaking mandarin? How does that work out?! Im lost.
I love the pictures. Shaylene looks SUPER different!!!! Love her!
Nick looks happy.
Chandler looks old.
I did get your letter.
The leader thing is killing me but its ok. I already know all that stuff but things dont work that way here. EVERYONE machetes to machete. One of the assistents calls me to machete me and tells me to machete my zone and then the other assistent calls me later that night saying Im doing a good job and tells me to animate my zone and not machete them. I get lost and confused but here I am, still workin and still worrying. Thats life in the mission.
I bought a ring this week. Well, I actually had it made. Its kewl. Ill show you some time.
I finally did a full 24 hour divisions with Elder Haddock and we kicked trash! I loved that day!!!! I was so happy and we were on fire. Lemme tell you what happened...
We were working hard all day visiting my investigadors and we were doing interviews for his district and we ran out of time! We had a half hour to look for new people to teach. So I said, elder haddock, we need to find newbies. He said, ok. So we went contacting. I went to a street that I knew of and we found and old investigador that we had taught before and he told us about an inactive member that lived on his street. We visited him and he didnt want to talk to us so he said, I gotta go but you can talk to my family! So we talked to them. There were four of them. So Elder Haddock said, lets put baptism dates on all of them. So he did.
We talked to them for five minutes inviting them to church, not even teaching them, and E. Haddock put a date on all of them. It was amazing.
Well, this greengo kid is still bugging me. CURSE HIM!
What more can I say!? Im doing good. Im happy, though stressed, but I deal with it.
Well, heres a pic I got of me all christmasy!
MOM, send me a christmas cookie recipe and a christmas cookie frosting recipe. We are planning on doing an activity with the zone.

LOVE YOU!

Elder Johnson

Elder Johnson
Nicaragua, Managua Mission

November 10, 2008

Sorry to say I havent received anything from you all today. The Nica computers suck I suppose. Im happy though....

We had changes. My comp E. Martinez got bumped up to AP and I got E. Miranda as my new comp. He's awesome, he's from Chile. Love him. But now the zone is on MY SHOULDERS! Which is not kewl. Im dying here.

Yesterday we woke up at five to gather our batallion of investigador bringing members that help us with church. Twas kewl. Then the APs called saying everyone had to go home after church cause the elections were nuts and people were dangerous outside. So we stayed inside. Then I got sick from stress....Then they called us again late like at 9 and said we had to bring the cell phones of the whole zone to our house cause we had to got to managua the next day and be there by 8. We did, I was sick, and Monday we woke up at 4....The president kept trying to chew us out but I didnt understand anything he said cause my brain wasnt working... it still isnt.

So I finished your package and I still havent sent it cause today was nuts and we didnt have time. Maybe sometime this week...

I gotta go. My brain isnt at liberty to write a lot. Sorry family. I know this is the crappiest letter youve received but what can I do. Im blasted sick right now....
Love you....

Elder Johnson

PS.... pray for me. These next few changes are either gonna kill me or help me grow.... maybe the two.
Elder Johnson
Nicaragua, Managua Mission

November 3, 2008

The Christmas package is ready.... it only lacks one thing, my voice recorded tape to you all. The thing is, I have had it on my to-do list... but every night I get home DEAD tired and look at it and go, tomorrow I guess Ill do it. So Im hoping to get it done before next monday so it can get to you before nick leaves.

HE GETS TO USE A BIKE!? Man.... you are blessed.

Yes, time is flying by. Today we completed 13 months. I said we cause Elder Haddock is next to me.... kewl. NO! I will not be trunky. Thats silly.

AZ is getting to have five temples..... Poor Nicas. Tis cause they dont pay their tithing nor go to church. Yeah, we are working on that.

You guys can read the book of mormon in three weeks if you try hard enough. I did it!

Shaylene...... she just needs to wait till she gets my letter in the Christmas package. I hope it does the trick. Give her advice from me. 1- Boys are stupid. Especially if they arent mormon, they are more stupid. 2- Everyone is stuck up, not just mormon people. Look at your friends and you will see they are making fun of the mormons more than the mormons make fun of your friends. 3- Do LIGHT for yourself, not cause everyone else does it. You are blessed with a goldfull of talents and if you dont use them, I will cry. Everything will be fine with her. Just have her wait for 11 more months. We will resolve everything when I get back.

Elections... Im scared about going home in a year. I dont want either to win. They both are liars to me. hehe! Im not excited about goin home to a communist country. yikers. The elections are goin on here too. It aint all that great either. Rather stupid really.

Yes Im having fun and success and what not. No, my comp still doesnt let me teach much. Luis never came back.

I need boots but I dunno if you wanna send it to me. Id rather receive cheese its and cream soda. I can handle the bootlessness. I dont trust shoes anymore. Im pretty positive that I will just wallow in broken boots cause there arent any that will stay alive more than two changes.

Love you all! Keep on smiling and being happy! Im good and snazzi!

October 27, 2008

Howdiness oh family of mine!

So we finished this month completing our goal of 11 baptisms and the zone is kind of doing bad but whatever. We have lowered our percentage of retention, which is bad because last month we had the best retention in all of Nicaragua. The President is gonna cut our heads off...

But that's ok. We are doing what we can and can only get better!
Yesterday Luis, the golden investigator that came to church saying he wanted to get baptized, didn't come and get baptized. My comp said he thought that Luis just wanted to get baptized to be a bishop cause he thought the bishop earned money. But then we told him that they don't and neither does anyone! So he left and never came back. How sad that there are people like that, right? Chupa.

Ready for something random?...

I saw a bum naked guy today.

Yeah, weird but true. It was an experience that reminded me that I was in Nicaragua. I was in a taxi driving to the church to go to district meeting and suddenly I saw him walking down the street and the first words that came to my mouth was... eergh? Which means I had no explanation for what I had seen. Yeah. Weird.

No, Alyssa has not written me. Not a bit. Send my love to all my friends and tell them merry Christmas for me.

Speaking of Christmas, I'm working on a great package for you peoples.
I've already written the letters and am working on buying the gifts. The only thing I lack is to voice record myself blabbing to ye all. Shall be snazzi.

Neal is taller than me? Blast it all giant! Don't be big. Big is for big people. That's big.

Fried artichoke hearts.... ha. Please family.... I've seen fried iguanas, bananas, soup, cereal... everything is fried. Yesterday I ate something good. It was a potato stuffed with meat dipped in some type of bread overcoat and... fried. Twas yummy. mmmmm....

Carrie got engaged? Then she broke it off? You should of seen my reaction. Elder Haddock laughed at me. It was like, WHAT!? then... Oh.
Send my regards to Carrie.

I don't have time to write Greg this week but the next time I do, I will hug him through the internet.

Elder Shamu is getting married!? Sweet. Everyone from Nauvoo that already came back from the mission is married. How trunky. hehe!

Tell Chandler to try out for Nauvoo and forget Hawaii. I love Light and Hawaii and what not but Nauvoo is worth the sacrifice.

Here's a pic I'm gonna send you. Enjoy it and I will write you next week. I love you lots!!!!

Elder Johnson

October 20, 2008

What!?

Just so Nick knows, I’m sorry. Hehe! I have had the GREATEST intention of writing him. It’s just that my friends are in dire need of help and I already know Nick is perfect, he doesn’t need my advice. Haha! Kidding. But seriously, I had written a LOOONG letter on real paper that I am planning on sending, but I will be sending it with the Christmas package I am putting together and hoping it will get to you before November ends. I just need next p-day to buy the stuff.

I will write him after this, cause I love him! THE BUFF!

I saw another miracle this week, actually a series of amazing miracles. Familia Cano got baptized. That means this month we have already 8 baptisms and they are all amazingly strong and firm in the church. Next week we have between 2 and 5 if everything works right. Twill be the first time I’m gonna meet my baptism goal, IM SO EXCITED!!!!!!! I’m finally with a comp that knows how to baptize and is teaching me!

My boots are still crapped out. And oh! I forgot to tell ya! We lived through a hurricane this week! I didn’t see the sun for four DAYS! The streets were rivers and I wore dirty wet clothes for four days straight cause the lady that cleans our clothes couldn’t come get them in the rain! It was fun.

I MISS NAUVOO!!!
Nicks bloody rich!

Mom wants to work again? Poochika mom! Make up your mind! Hehe! First you wanna work then ya don’t then ya do then your shoe! Yikers. Hehe! Kiddin!

I’m gonna send the songs next time cause I forgot to bring the lyrics. I love those songs too. I hope to write more. Hehe!

Well... I gotta end this early to write to Nick! YAY! Hehe! Love you all and I will write you next week. Just know I am really happy here and everything is working out. The second year is so much better than the first.

Love you all!

E. Nate Johnson

Elder Johnson

Nicaragua, Managua Mission

October 13, 2008

WHAT!!!!
What the crubdonker? Nolan hit his head? Was he bleeding a lot? kewl.
Man! He isnt going to remember when I get back!!!! NOOOOOOO!
Well. Thats ok. I guess I will just be that wierd guy that takes over his room when I get back. hehe!
Hey, GREAT NEWS! I surely feel humbled. Fam. Ochoa has been through hell, literally, to get to where they are now. The morning of the baptism I had a dream that they kept putting exuses cause they didnt want to get baptized and I was trying to talk them into it. It made me very worried. But yesterday morning at 7 am they got married and her husband, the drunk, stayed to watch them get baptized. They look so much happier now. We also baptized two other girls who werent really planned to be baptized this week. YAY!
So I am feeling really good. E. Martinez is teaching me things that I hadnt known before. I baptized 5 this week, almost more than I had for the last six months. I feel like I saw a miracle.
Yes, my boots are worn out. Yes, for kicking chickens, kicking pastors from apostate churches, the rain, walking, running, skipping, trotting, prancing, bad streets full of rocks that belong on the moon, kicking my zone in the face, and for pumpkins. That last one was donated by Elder Haddock who is helpíng me write this email and is attempting to maintain my insanity.
No I dont have a rain jacket nor a poncho. I knew a guy named poncho.
YOU WENT TO MEXICO WITHOUT ME!!!!! Tears of wisdom flood my purple face. What does purple smell like?
Ah yes, Christmas package. Do send me one, with things for me and maybe for my comps. But no, not for kids in the area. They dont appreciate me. hehe!
List of things I need-
Twix, Cream soda (You promised you would send me a little bit for christmas, dont make me cry. Its been a year without), EFY music, green ties, black socks and normal white socks, more blister moleskin bandaid stuff, cream soda, green things, more photos of people in the world and my family and my friends and my house, cream soda, and other stuff that I cant think of right now but if it comes to me I will tell you. If you can send Aaron in a box, do it. hehe! Kidding, slightly.
Well, Im good and swell. I will write you next week! Tell nolan to get better and remember me!!!!
Love you all!

October 6, 2008

HEY!
Yes, I watched conference. All the sessions but the second one on Saturday. I loved them. By the way, I dont look at the ZL thing as a promotion either, more like a demotion. Hehe! Just joking around. Im loving it. I feel like its a great chance to change some things and learn a lot. Its a chance to progress. My comp is amazing and teaching me everything! I have learned so stinkin much!

I loved Utchdorfs talk too. But I loved more the talk by James J. Hamula. He sounds like he knows Nicaragua...
The shower works every now and then. I am back to bucket bathing most of the time. We live in a house owned by Catholics. They are nice though. I dont have a cell, my comp does and I have to use it sometimes, which aint too thrilling to me. hehe!

Our batallion is reactivating and converting new members. They are doing everything. Its helping a lot. We have an amazing family we are teaching right now who has every type of problem that exists. They are the family Ochoa. We told them the first day we met them that Satan is going to attack them hard. And oh did he!!! He has been kicking them around since the first day. The day after we found them we set a baptism date with them and that same day the mom, Anita, got attacked by a snake, choked on a fishbone, and someone robbed their house. Then someone came lying about Joseph Smith saying we worship and pray to him... ha! Then just yesterday someone said that if she went to the mormon church she was condemned. Shes smart though and doesnt listen. She knows its true. Her husband drinks a lot and she doesnt want to get married to him. We are working REAL hard with them. They are going to be a powerful happy family, I just know it!!!!

I did sing in the missionary choir, although we didnt get the kewl chance to sing in conference. I didnt see anyone I knew this last time.

I have some grand story to tell you. This last week it rained a lot. We got wet. We were teaching family Ochoa and suddenly we left and everywhere was filled to the brim with water!!! It was like walking in a lake!!!! Craziness! We made it pretty far when suddenly there was a muddy river too large to cross. My comp was smart and threw a rock in the middle to jump across. He made it. I went, but my weight difference is greater, so it moved and I went in. I was soaked up to my neck with water and mud. It was great...
hehe!

By the way, those kewl boots you sent me have holes in the bottom. Im looking to get them re-soled. Crazy, eh?

I love you all tons and am feeling great! Learning a lot and walking a lot and working REALLY hard!!!

Love and kisses,
Elder Johnson
Nicaragua, Managua Mission